I Swear to God

I did NOT mean to break the big glass bowl with the prefab shells and the fake blue sand. I was washing my face and all of a sudden my bottle of Astara Cleansing Gel shimmied off the shelf and dolphin-dove into the beach below. It was probably expecting waves.

If I'm not careful my toothpaste will capsize the sailboat. And my Q-tips will fling themselves against the seashell strings and yank them from the wall.

You all know how very much that would upset me.